Semler Scientific Goes All-In: 105,000 Bitcoin Purchase Plan Sends SMLR Stock Surging 12%

Semler Scientific just dropped a bombshell—and Wall Street's scrambling to keep up. The healthcare-turned-crypto-adjacent firm announced plans to acquire a staggering 105,000 Bitcoin, triggering an instant 12% stock price rally. Because nothing boosts shareholder confidence like betting the farm on volatile digital assets.

From stethoscopes to Satoshis

The company's pivot from medical equipment to Bitcoin maximalism would make Michael Saylor blush. With this move, Semler joins the growing list of public firms using corporate treasuries as personal crypto casinos—disguised as 'hedges against inflation,' naturally.

Market reaction: euphoria with side-eye

Traders piled into SMLR shares despite the inherent irony: a healthcare company leveraging its balance sheet to chase the ultimate speculative asset. The 12% pop suggests investors either believe in the strategy... or just want front-row seats to the spectacle.

One thing's certain—Semler's playing with fire. When your Bitcoin treasury exceeds your market cap (and possibly your annual revenue), you're not hedging. You're gambling. But hey—at least it's more exciting than another earnings call about blood pressure cuffs.