BREAKING: DOGE ETF Set to Launch as First US Fund to Hold ’Zero-Utility’ Asset
Wall Street finally embraces the meme—Dogecoin ETFs hit the market, proving even 'useless' assets can find a home in regulated finance.
The Regulatory Green Light
SEC approval shocks traditionalists—first-ever fund backing a cryptocurrency with no underlying utility or protocol function. Opens floodgates for speculative assets entering mainstream portfolios.
Market Mechanics Exposed
Fund structure bypasses conventional asset requirements—holds pure DOGE without staking yields or governance rights. Creates precedent for packaging internet culture as investable product.
Institutional Paradox
Major firms now allocating to an asset whose value derives entirely from social sentiment—quant funds modeling meme virality alongside traditional metrics.
Because nothing says 'mature market' like bankers desperately trying to monetize jokes while pretending it's sophisticated finance.
