🚀 Bitcoin ETF Inflows Explode 250% as BTC Shatters All-Time Highs

Wall Street’s crypto FOMO hits ludicrous speed

---

The floodgates are open

Bitcoin ETFs just saw their biggest weekly surge since launch—a jaw-dropping 250% inflow spike as BTC punched through previous price ceilings. Traders are piling in like this is the last lifeboat off the Titanic (which, given traditional finance’s track record, might not be far off).

Institutional money wakes up

After months of sideways action, the dam broke. Pension funds and hedge funds finally realized their 60/40 portfolios were getting wrecked by inflation—and that digital gold actually glitters. The kicker? This rally’s just getting started.

The cynical take

Of course Wall Street only embraced crypto after figuring out how to slap 2% management fees on it. But hey—if it gets grandma into Bitcoin before the halving, we’ll call it progress.