Markets Rally as Trump Delays EU Tariffs—Traders Cheer Short-Term Relief
Wall Street surges on political whiplash—again. The Dow rockets 400 points as another headline-driven sugar rush hits equities. ’Buy the rumor, sell the news’ traders feast on volatility.
Tariff delay sparks rally: Markets cling to any pause in trade wars like crypto degens to a 2% green candle. Analysts whisper about ’temporary relief’ through gritted teeth—everyone knows the real pain gets outsourced to next quarter’s earnings calls.
Classic ’sell-side optimism’ in full effect: Banks upgrade targets while quietly hedging their client portfolios. Meanwhile, Main Street still can’t afford groceries. Happy days are here again—for now.