Semler Scientific Goes Full Bitcoin Whale: 4,636 BTC Stash and 29% YTD Surge Defy Traditional Finance

Wall Street's scratching its head—while this medtech-turned-crypto player quietly stacks sats like a digital Scrooge McDuck.

The Bitcoin Bet That's Beating the S&P 500

Semler Scientific isn't just dabbling—they've gone all-in with a 4,636 BTC treasury position. That's more Bitcoin than most hedge funds dare hold, and their 29% year-to-date yield is making bond traders weep into their spreadsheets.

When Your Corporate Strategy Outperforms Crypto ETFs

While traditional finance scrambles to launch Bitcoin ETFs with 0.8% expense ratios, Semler's direct accumulation strategy bypasses Wall Street's middlemen—and their fees. The move reeks of that delicious corporate desperation that only comes when fiat currencies start smelling like stale printer ink.

The Cynical Kick

Meanwhile, Goldman Sachs is still hosting 'blockchain webinars' for clients who think Satoshi is a sushi order.