Crypto Carnage: Bitcoin Plunge Triggers $500M Long Bloodbath as DOGE, ADA Tank 7%

Crypto markets got steamrolled today as Bitcoin’s sudden 5% nosedive forced half a billion in leveraged longs to walk the plank. Meme coin darling Dogecoin and smart contract contender Cardano (ADA) led the altcoin massacre—both shedding 7% in an hour as traders scrambled for exits.

The liquidation frenzy hit hardest on Binance and Bybit, where over-enthusiastic bulls learned the oldest lesson in crypto (again): your ’hedge’ is just someone else’s exit liquidity. Meanwhile, institutional analysts dusted off their ’macro headwinds’ PowerPoint decks—because nothing says ’professional risk management’ like blaming the Fed after getting rekt.

Silver lining? At least the perpetual funding rates reset to something resembling sane levels. Until next week’s leverage-fueled pump-and-dump cycle, that is.